Stopping an ex changing your child’s surname

The quick answer

Everyone with parental responsibility has to consent to a change of name for a child under 16, so if you have it, your ex needs your agreement or a court order. HM Passport Office won’t accept the change without everyone’s consent, and the Department for Education tells schools not to change a surname without written evidence that the other parent agrees.

If you can’t agree, the family court can make a prohibited steps order to stop a change, or a specific issue order to settle or reverse one. And if you reach a compromise, such as a double-barrel, our child’s deed poll records it with both your signatures for £14.95.

Act early

Tell the people who matter

The school

Write to the head teacher saying you have parental responsibility and don’t consent. The Department for Education tells schools not to change a surname without written evidence that the other parent agrees, sourced independently of the parent asking.

The Passport Office

HM Passport Office won’t accept a child’s change of name unless everyone with parental responsibility consents, and without a court order it issues the passport in the child’s original name. If you’re worried about your child being taken abroad, GOV.UK says the Passport Office will usually only stop a passport with a court order, so call the Passport Adviceline.

The GP, dentist and clubs

Let them know too, so a new name isn’t used on your ex’s word alone.

The rules for schools and passports are in the guidance below. DfE: parental responsibility guidance for schools HM Passport Office: change of name applications GOV.UK: stop a child getting a passport

If you can’t agree

The court orders that stop or reverse a change

Order	What it does
Prohibited steps order	Stops your ex making a decision about your child’s upbringing, such as a new surname, without the court’s say-so
Specific issue order	Settles one question, such as which surname your child uses, and can reverse a change already made
Child arrangements order	Says who your child lives with or spends time with. While one says who they live with, a new surname needs everyone’s written consent or the court’s permission

Applications start with form C100. You may need to go to a mediation information and assessment meeting first, unless, for example, you have evidence of domestic abuse or it’s urgent. GOV.UK says the court fee is £270, with help if you’re on benefits or a low income. GOV.UK: apply for a court order

The court decides on your child’s welfare. The Court of Appeal’s guidelines in Re W, Re A, Re B (1999) treat the registered surname as an important factor, give little weight to a parent wanting the child to match them, and say the reasons for an earlier one-sided change may be relevant.

Agreed a way forward?

A double-barrel, or the original name back, recorded in one child’s deed poll that you both sign. Order by 6pm, Monday to Friday, for same-day processing.

Start a child’s deed poll What’s included

Already changed?

If your ex has already changed it

If your ex has started using a new surname with the school or GP without your agreement, put your objection in writing to both, and ask them to keep your child’s registered name on their records. The Passport Office won’t accept a change made without everyone’s consent.

If talking doesn’t work, a specific issue order can reverse it. Once the name goes back, or you agree a new one, a child’s deed poll signed by you both puts it in writing for every organisation, so there’s no room for doubt later.

As they grow up

When your child is old enough to decide

The court considers a child’s wishes in the light of their age and understanding. From 16, a young person can change their own name without either parent’s consent, and HM Passport Office won’t accept objections to a change they make themselves after turning 16.

Your questions answered

Frequently asked questions

Not if you have parental responsibility. Everyone with parental responsibility has to agree, or there has to be a court order.

Tell them, the school and the GP in writing that you don’t consent. If that isn’t enough, apply to the family court for a prohibited steps order.

Yes. You can ask the family court for a specific issue order, and the Passport Office won’t accept a change without everyone’s consent in the meantime.

It shouldn’t without written evidence that you agree. The Department for Education tells schools to check with the other parent independently.

You can still apply to the family court, because any parent can ask for an order about their child. You can also apply for parental responsibility.

Your child’s welfare. The registered surname is an important factor, and wanting the child to match one parent usually carries little weight.

Check the detail

Sources for this guide

Guidance and reference pages

The official rules this guide is based on, checked in October 2026.

Ready when you are

Agree it, sign it, settle it.

When you’ve found a name you can both live with, our child’s deed poll records it with a signature space for each of you. Prepared, checked and posted free for £14.95.

Start a child’s deed poll See what’s included

The quick answer

Why your consent is needed

Tell the people who matter

The school

The Passport Office

The GP, dentist and clubs

The court orders that stop or reverse a change

Agreed a way forward?

If your ex has already changed it

When your child is old enough to decide

Frequently asked questions

Can my ex change our child’s surname without my permission?▾

How do I stop my ex changing my child’s surname?▾

Can I reverse a name change made without my consent?▾

Will the school change my child’s surname if my ex asks?▾

What if I don’t have parental responsibility?▾

What does a court consider?▾

Sources for this guide

Guidance and reference pages

Related guides

A child’s surname to mum’s or dad’s

When the other parent won’t agree

Changing a child’s name at school

Agree it, sign it, settle it.